^ CaTcH tHe HoLy SpIrIt FiRe^

catchthefire @ 2005-05-21T06:58:00

2005-05-21T12:30:56Z

¹⁹Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, ^{20Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,}^{21Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.}^{22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,}^{23Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.}^{24And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.}^{25If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.}^{26Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another."Galatians5:19-25}

**Sometimes I feel like people think the only sins are the obvious ones like drinking, drugs, and sex.
I don't know about you guys, but some of the things of the sinful nature list, I do everyday.... Thank God He is a forgiving God. I need to repent, I dont do that enough. These are good self-evaluating scripture, See which ones on the sinful nature you exert, and then see which ones of the fruits you exert.

Adultery--

Greek for 3431

Pronunciation Guide
moicheuo {moy-khyoo'-o} 1) to commit adultery a) to be an adulterer b) to commit adultery with, have unlawful intercourse with another's wife c) of the wife: to suffer adultery, be debauched d) A Hebrew idiom, the word is used of those who at a woman's solicitation are drawn away to idolatry, i.e. to the eating of things sacrificed to idols

Fornication--

Greek for 4202

Pronunciation Guide
porneia {por-ni'-ah} 1) illicit sexual intercourse a) adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc. b) sexual intercourse with close relatives; Lev. 18 c) sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman; Mk. 10:11,12 2) metaph. the worship of idols a) of the defilement of idolatry, as incurred by eating the sacrifices offered to idols

Uncleaness--

Greek for 167

Pronunciation Guide
akatharsia {ak-ath-ar-see'-ah} ) uncleanness a) physical b) in a moral sense: the impurity of lustful, luxurious, profligate living 1) of impure motives

Lasciviousness--

Greek for 766

Pronunciation Guide
aselgeia {as-elg'-i-a} 1) unbridled lust, excess, licentiousness, lasciviousness, wantonness, outrageousness, shamelessness, insolence

Idolatry--

Greek for 1495

Pronunciation Guide
eidololatreia {i-do-lol-at-ri'-ah} 1) the worship of false gods, idolatry a) of the formal sacrificial feats held in honour of false gods b) of avarice, as a worship of Mammon 2) in the plural, the vices springing from idolatry and peculiar to it

witchcraft--

Greek for 5331

Pronunciation Guide
pharmakeia {far-mak-i'-ah} 1) the use or the administering of drugs 2) poisoning 3) sorcery, magical arts, often found in connection with idolatry and fostered by it 4) metaph. the deceptions and seductions of idolatry

Hatred--

Greek for 2189

Pronunciation Guide
echthra {ekh'-thrah} 1) enmity 2) cause of enmity

variance--

Greek for 2054

Pronunciation Guide
eris {er'-is} 1) contention, strife, wrangling

Emulations--

Greek for 2205

Pronunciation Guide
zelos {dzay'-los} 1) excitement of mind, ardour, fervour of spirit a) zeal, ardour in embracing, pursuing, defending anything 1) zeal in behalf of, for a person or thing 2) the fierceness of indignation, punitive zeal b) an envious and contentious rivalry, jealousy

Wrath--

Greek for 2372

Pronunciation Guide
thumos {thoo-mos'} 1) passion, angry, heat, anger forthwith boiling up and soon subsiding again 2) glow, ardour, the wine of passion, inflaming wine (which either drives the drinker mad or kills him with its strength)

Strife--

Greek for 2052

Pronunciation Guide
eritheia {er-ith-i'-ah 1) electioneering or intriguing for office a) apparently, in the NT a courting distinction, a desire to put one's self forward, a partisan and fractious spirit which does not disdain low arts b) partisanship, fractiousness ++++ This word is found before NT times only in Aristotle where it denotes a self-seeking pursuit of political office by unfair means. (A&G) Paul exhorts to be one in the mind of Christ not putting self forward or being selfish (Phil 2:3). James 3:14 speaks against having selfishness or self-promoting in your heart. Wayne Steury

Seditions--

Greek for 1370

Pronunciation Guide
dichostasia {dee-khos-tas-ee'-ah} 1) dissension, division

Heresies--

Greek for 139

Pronunciation Guide
hairesis {hah'-ee-res-is} 1) act of taking, capture: e.g. storming a city 2) choosing, choice 3) that which is chosen 4) a body of men following their own tenets (sect or party) a) of the Sadducees b) of the Pharisees c) of the Christians 5) dissensions arising from diversity of opinions and aims

Envyings--

Greek for 5355

Pronunciation Guide
phthonos {fthon'-os} 1) envy 2) for envy, i.e. prompted by envy

Murders--

Greek for 5408

Pronunciation Guide
phonos {fon'-os} 1) murder, slaughter

Drunkenness--

Greek for 3178

Pronunciation Guide
methe {meth'-ay} 1) intoxication 2) drunkenness

Revellings--

Greek for 2970

Pronunciation Guide
komos {ko'-mos} ) a revel, carousal a) a nocturnal and riotous procession of half drunken and frolicsome fellows who after supper parade through the streets with torches and music in honour of Bacchus or some other deity, and sing and play before houses of male and female friends; hence used generally of feasts and drinking parties that are protracted till late at night and indulge in revelry

catchthefire @ 2005-05-16T23:18:00

2005-05-17T04:57:21Z

ARE YOU HAPPY I DID FREAKING LJ CUTS???????????????????????LOL

catchthefire @ 2005-04-20T05:50:00

2005-04-20T11:03:41Z

ok.. have more pictures.. but tired of posting... lol

catchthefire @ 2005-03-27T10:02:00

2005-03-27T16:06:00Z

Jesus... Thank you isnt a big enough word......

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't even comprehend it!

You are Awesome, amazing, wonderful,etc... but I say those words to everyone

I tell noone that they are Holy......

So you are HOLY LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Whatever that means.. its your word.... I use it for noone but you !!!!!!!!

Thoughts on B.J's crazy mind.....

2005-03-22T19:03:16Z

+++I feel like I know my Jesus so little. Ever since I got saved in the 7th grade its been about standing up and out for Christ. I havent focused on my own heart as much as I should. It's not about works and how often I am at church. It isn't about my worship in front/with others..its about my worship when no one is watching.It's about my heart. I want to be Spirit led, but then I try to do my own will... crazy girl.

I was very upset about all of this Sunday night and Jaime helped me alot,she helped me realize that I am allowing myself to work according to the Spirit more than I think. Its true. She went through the fruits of the Spirit with me. I would never have some of those traits if it wasn't for God. It's not about what you do but your heart!!!!!!!!!

I know I don't have one of those drastic testimonies where I was taking drugs and drinking and in jail and Jesus saved me from it all...... but Jesus has changed me and still is changing me like noone else can. He saved me from all that before I had the temptation and he had a purpose for it.If I stayed with the same attitude that I had when I was in the 7th grade I would be one of those people. But God saved me at young age for a purpose. I have made plenty and I mean plenty of mistakes. God's power is made perfect in my weakness:) My weaknesses aren't really with drinking and smoking.I mean yes, I drank a little before I got saved and I smoked cigerettes like a year ago, but my weaknesses have always been with relationships. I often get very embarassed about some of the mistakes I have made. I am a very forgetful person, so I forget some of the stupid things I have said and done, but when they come back to my memory, they come back like a ton of bricks. I wonder what some people see when they walk up to me. You know how you walk up and all you can remember is the past things they have said and done. If people do that with me I am embarassed. Especially with ex-boyfriends and friends. I want to say Im sorry to so many people for stupid things I have said and done around them. I thank God that the past isn't an issue with Him. Not even yesterday, or an hour ago. All that matters is my heart right now!!!! I love you Jesus!!!!!!!

catchthefire @ 2005-03-21T12:36:00

2005-03-21T18:41:31Z

Thank you Jesus that you have filled my mouth with truth. I don't even have the ability to tell a good lie... yes I tell little white lies here and there, but to bold-face lie... I can't do it.... This morning I tried. It was so much easier to tell the truth. I felt such a relief.

newayz...what was I thinking??.... I think I ruined my mommy's day.. that sux.

crazy girl...

I love you JESUS!!!

Jaime Ammerman is so incredible, she helped me so much last night. It was just God that she walked in my room when she did. :)

Good times with a very awesome boy last night:).

Revival is here!!!!!!!

2005-03-12T17:04:40Z

Revival is here and I don't wanna be anywhere but where it is! Jesus is AMAZING!!!! He's changing hearts left and right!!!!!

It's NOT OVER YET.... IT'S JUST BEGINNNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YA WANNA COME ON THE REVIVAL TRAIN... THERE'S NO TURNING BACK~~~WHOOT WHOOT... LOL

JEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I say I love you to alot of people. But I don't tell anyone they are HOLY. You are HOLY AND WORTHY OF EVERY ONCE OF MY BEING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYTHING I AM, YOU GAVE ME.

catchthefire @ 2005-03-08T01:21:00

2005-03-08T07:24:11Z

YES YET ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL SISTER.... (THE ONE ON THE FAR LEFT!)

QUESTION??

2005-03-07T20:28:37Z

GOTTA A QUESTION...

It seems like God is moving in all the churches in our area, not just our church

If anyone reads this outside this area....

IS GOD MOVING LIKE THIS EVERYWHERE?

LIKE REVIVAL STYLE... PEOPLE GETTING SAVED ..LIKE PEOPLE YOU WOULD NEVER THINK WOULD.. JUST TURNING THEIR LIFE AROUND AND EVERYONE GETTING EXCITED ABOUT IT?

If not I guess its what we have been praying for. A revival in the city of Birmingham.

I LOVE IT

BLAH BLAH

2005-03-07T10:39:09Z

LAST NIGHT @ CHURCH WAS INCREDIBLE. The most amazing thing ever. I have been wanting that to happen in our church for along time... and I wasn't even apart of it because I was being stupid. The whole place was rocking out for Jesus. There wasn't one person standing still. People were just truly worship and didnt care.

I am stupid ..plain stupid.

My mom came up to me and grabbed me and said its time that you be baptized with the Holy Spirit. It shocked me, because that is something that I just quit working for a couple of years ago. I REFUSED. She said are you ok. I said no I dont want to.. How do you refuse somethign God has promised you????STUPIDITY. I was afraid I would just seek speaking in tongues ya know... I didnt wanna try without understanding it. But I am never going to understand it till I have it.STUPID. Now I think the way I am probably going to recieve it is with my mom because that is where I am going to have to humble myself. I get so much pride against her. I HATE IT. I hate the devil. Stupid.I wanted to run away.. my mom left!!! ugh I havent talked to her.. I dunno if she is upset or not. It messed with me the rest of the night. People prayed for me... but I felt stupid I didnt wanna draw attention to me and have a stupid pity part. I have no reason not to praise God. Nothing terrible has been going on in my life. I have everything to be thankful for.....yet I make some kind of problem when theres not one.... UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH'
Its ok
God is good...
Thank you Jesus for what you are doing in my church, family , friends, and me!!!!!!

Fun Weekend

2005-03-06T14:11:35Z

Friday-- Girls Night/Dance ministry bonding time.... very fun... LOVE THOSE GIRLS

Sat-- went to Civic Center w/ stepmom, Granny, sister-in-law, and niece.... fun stuff

Hung out with the coolest girl in the world till time for the show @ the shma

Shma was great. Saw and talked to alot of people. Favorite time: at the end of Mortal Treason.... God is amazing...

Worship in sanctuary... INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE THOSE KIDS!!!!

Today... going to church, ride a helicopter, and I dunno what else

THE END.. LOVE YOU ALL

catchthefire @ 2005-03-03T07:21:00

2005-03-03T13:21:42Z

GOD IS AMAZING.

PERIOD.

THE END.

FOREVER.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2005-03-02T05:47:09Z

PROM DATE OFFICIALLY CANCELLED. SURPRISE,SURPRISE. ALREADY PLANNED ON IT HAPPENING. TICKETS DUE FRIDAY.... FUN FUN.

TAKING APPLICATIONS FOR PROM DATE......

NAME,ADDRESS, SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER, PIN NUMBER, CREDIT CARD NUMBER, BIRTH CERTIFICATE, AND PHOTO ID ARE REQUIRED.....

LOL

NAH I TALKED TO BETH TONIGHT... PROBABLY GOING TO GO WITH A GROUP OF GIRLS AGAIN. I LOVE THAT GIRL!!! SHES THE GREATEST.

catchthefire @ 2005-02-26T02:48:00

2005-02-26T08:50:01Z

I had so much fun tonight...
Thanks for inviting me Sam and Ci!!!! We definently have to do that more often.

B.J. = CRAZY SHYNESS AND QUIETNESS... UGH

catchthefire @ 2005-02-24T22:30:00

2005-02-25T04:31:01Z

GUYS QUIT DROOLING... MY SISTER IS GORGEOUS..I KNOW I KNOW...

catchthefire @ 2005-02-22T10:37:00

2005-02-22T16:55:44Z

--What God is dealing with me about--

*It's not all about me... Ever since I got saved in the 7th grade it has been all about standing up for Jesus in my school and standing out for Jesus.But, its not to bring attention to ME. It's not for ME to be a better person. It's not to make me a better person. It's so God can ultimately be lifted up and glorified not matter what. Which is totally against human nature. Even if it means raising up a leader and sitting in the shadow while they save the masses. As long as my Jesus gets all the glory and all the praise.
I really want others to have all Jesus has to offer. Its not being part of the few. It's about the few making it to where they are not few anymore!!! I really want to truly DESIRE this for others out of the pit of my heart. I WANT EVERYONE TO UNDERSTAND. Satan tries to turn and twist things. He wants us to think its about us. It's a daily struggle I have. I have to fight it daily. But its not about me. I want others to realize the power they can have through the HOLY SPIRIT. The same one that lives in me lived in Jesus, lives in my pastor, lives in my friends... and can live in anyone that recieves and can do anything through them. GOD made me. I have no special ability that I didnt get from Him. Noone is more qualified than anyone else because we all come from the same factory!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Something else I think God has been dealing with me about is my mouth. When to speak and I guess when not to. There is power in your words. I have found that the biggest battle for me is in my mind. That's where Satan gets me. Gets my mind to start wondering. Gets me down about my insecurities and lack of outgoingness(lol) But God has given me the perfect verse for that. Proverbs 3:26---which to sum it up says the Lord is my confidence and will keep my foot from being snared.... AWESOME... HE is my confidence!!!!!!!! He is my strength. But about the power of your words thing.... I have found that Satan wants to shut us up. My mind will go crazy. I will think all these crazy things going down the road driving. That is the hardest time to pray. I dont want to open my mouth or do anything but think. But I cant dwell on it. I have found that when that happens.... to basically call Satan down on it..quote scripture something... pray right then... OUT LOUD... yes you will look like you are talking ot yourself driving down the road.. but OH WELL... That's what I personally have to do ... My mind belongs to Jesus... he has no authority over it. And I have also found not just that but in things .. like for instance in church.. when I pray or "sing" I do it really quietly I whisper when I "sing".. but I have found that that is also a place that Satan wants to shut me up.. so I try to pray out loud with authority and confidence and sing......I sound terrible.. yes .... but....

* THANK YOU GOD!!! YOU ARE MOVING IN MY FAMILY, FRIENDS,SCHOOL, AND CHURCH. AND ITS NOT OVER YET.... IT IS ONLY BEGINNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

catchthefire @ 2005-02-20T20:49:00

2005-02-21T02:51:20Z

If any Pinson people happen to stubble upon my journal... COME TO BIBLE STUDY TOMMORROW NIGHT @ THE SPOT ON PINSON MAIN STREET. 7:00!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back from the dead randomness... sorry the pics are so big.. I am LD

2005-02-19T23:54:38Z

Sams crazy picture taking

Prom Dress

I have no life

Bonnie Jane is better

Sammy

OMG its the singer from Tomorrow in Red... ::faints::

dodododomdodododododom

2004-09-01T00:24:28Z

* LA TI DA........NEWAYZ..... My day wasn't bad. Nothing interesing... again. Did pick out our senior homecoming shirts.... they are sand-something green.. like a khaki green color.. I hope they look good.. I didnt really pick it. Mr Smith did. All the other shirts are gray. They all have the same design but the seniors will have seniors written on the front. And I am 90% sure our nickname shirts are pale pink with black writing. Deca shirts I am not sure on yet. but we get first dibbs on the senior spirit packs!!!!!yay!!!! n-e-wayz...

* Only exciting thing... isnt that sad. Oh yeah.. now our plane tickets are officially ordered!!!!! We are going to leave October 16-come back October 21. I am excited .. never flown b4. We are leaving from B'ham, stopping in Chicago, going to Washington. THen coming home, stopping in Detriot, and then coming home!!! yay yay yay....... going to see my future job... flight attendant!!!lol

*Tonight I have to talk to my mom about our senior trip to California... yay... I hope she gives the ok..... yayyayaya....... newayz... i am done

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

unaware of my fears,unaware of my shame, all that matters here is... GLORIFYING YOUR NAME!!!!

2004-08-26T05:16:59Z

*****Tonight at church was amazing:)...... For some reason all day I have been wanting to go to Cathedral(not to see the boy).... and I know why now...

*****WORSHIP WAS AMAZING... JUST AMAZING.... and so was just everything.....

ILOVE YOU JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I dont want my hunger to leave when I walk into depression pit tommorrow(aka...school).... I dont want my thoughts and ideas to go away. I want to use the gifts I have. ITS NOT ABOUT ME. I HAVE NO WORTH OR VALUE ALONE. YOU GIVE ME MY WORTH. IN YOUR BLOOD I HAVE VALUE. I CANT SPEAK TO PEOPLE WITHOUT YOU... I AM TOO SHY ON MY OWN.. ANOINT MY LIPS LORD!!!!!!

******also ..good news for the dance team at church... we get to have our little thing and we get outfits:)yay..

lalalalalalala

**~~**FORGIVE ME**~~**
-for trying to take my future into my hands.. when you already know it anyway
-for my selfishness
-for my pride
-for not being in your word
-for talking when I need to listen
-FRIENDS----forgive me for not being very loyal and losing contact.....
-KYLE- for acting weird everytime I see you. I am paranoid about what you think.. I dont want you to think that I am trying to make you feel bad or jealous or something.
-and anything else I may have done...

-

freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedommmmmm

2004-08-23T20:52:21Z

*Yesterday and TOday have just been incredible days!!!
I love Jesus!!!
Yesterday I went to church.. THen me, my mom,russ,micheal, and the other guy thats going to be staying with us ..but I keep forgetting his name..but newayz.. we went to Ruby Tuesdays and ate.....
I saw crazy Billy whos there ALL the time...lol
newayz..
then me,russ,and mom went to sams...her favorite store.

Then I just went back to the church early with Russ..... and this is when the awesomeness started.....
He was like really frustrated because he had no way to get in toget anything done for this youth rally he is at today in Tennessee...that he was supposed to get ready in 4 days....I couldnt take it.. I said lets pray...cause I just knew that adviously something is going to happen up in Tenn. if he was under that much frustration....
Then that night at church... it was just awesome....
We always talk about how dance does things in the spirit realm..but last night it like I physically saw it.
We were doing Come now is the time to worship(which I hate.... but its good when cathedral does it at least) ..but during that horrible song .. Amy(my dance leader ) just went crazy.... and then here I come just jumping around going crazy in the middle ofa dance.... omg.... the dance that night just set something up for freedom throughout thewhole church.....!!!!!!!amazing..... THANK YOU JESUS FOR YOUR FREEDOM.
AND GUESS WHAT.... I danced by myself... or....I dont know if you would call it dance...but I jumped and went crazy for God:)whoooooooooooo ... Amy was like I love being a fool for Jesus....

Then today was just awesome.. I just wanna share the freedom with everyone......

--keep coach stalls, mrs,stalls, mrs smith, and their family in your prayers

catchthefire @ 2004-09-22T01:32:00

2004-08-22T06:33:07Z

Today was a pretty good day..... I was supposed to go to the lake ..but it was all rainy and overcast........:(

I went with my mom to Rays new house in willowridge.. it is really nice.. I am proud of them.. Him and a friend went in together and paid for it...

Then mom,me,ray,russ, and chad went and ate....

Then crazy eyebrow plucking fest with me, my mom, and russ...lol

Then we went to brookwood and the summit to shop... I didnt fell like shopping for me...

Then we went to see Chelsea Layne at work.. it was fun.. we made Russ try on girl cloths!!!

THen we stopped by at a guy from church's house... Gave Russ some of his clothes...lol.. always good...

Then we went to Wally world... saw Eric.... havent seen him in awhile....

Then we went back and ordered pizza and watched Godsent... which is scary.. but just pisses me off cause the ending....

I think this is the end.. lol since I took you step by step of my day...lol

catchthefire @ 2004-09-21T06:40:00

2004-08-21T11:40:24Z

Yeah... I didnt go to the show last night.. sorry Austin!!!.... but I had a blast....

I went with Russ, Haney, Andrea, and Ashley bowling. It was sooooo much fun..... Russ and his stupid strikes... ugh..... he had like 160!!! who does that.....I had like 50....lol....
I really liked the girls..I just met them tonight... they were really cool.
We also went to Wings.... it was good as well..... Haney and Russ were cracking us up....it was so funny.... lol

Newayz.. then we got back to my house and of course EVERYTIME i lay down to watch a movie... I fall asleep... and I did.....so booooooooring....but NEWAYZ

Today..if it does rain.. I am going with Russ and his parents tothe lake!!

THATS ALL.. I LOVE YOU GUYS

today has been a great day

2004-08-20T20:05:18Z

Today was a GREAT day!! and going to be even better once I see the boi!! lol

The only bad thing that happened was me getting a bad grade on my test... but that was expected...I am really trying to do my best in school but not get all wrapped up in making the best grades ...its just not in me. I know the knowledge of this world will pass away anyway... why do we spend half our lives studying so much....lol newayz....for people that need it to go the places God wants them to go its great... for people like me that thinks it has no purpose in my future... not so good... but maybe I think totally wrong... God is going to use my HOnors diploma to place me somewhere.... WHO KNOWS... ANYWAY

I had so much fun in 2nd block. Racheal wasnt there because of her birthday though:( but Kym, Beth , and the girl that I always forget her name.. had fun lol... Kym and I are wonderful singers.... NOT!!!!!!!We so didnt get our work done!!!

3rd block we watched Pirates of the Caribbean... I got farther then Chelsea and I ever do when we watch it.. but still havent finished that movie!!!lol

Today I felt good... I talked to people I had never spoken to b4...like a bunch of them.. and tried to talk to everyone I know and used to be friends with but have now kinda neglected to talk to:) I feel good about today...

Oh yeah I forgot .. and First Prioity went really well... RICHARD IS AMAZING!!!! He has totally stepped up!!! I love it...this year is goingto be great... THANK YOU GOD FOR HIM AND WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO!!

OH YEah... I gotta remember to pray for Jamies grandad.... pray for him as well!

THis is long but oh well...

oh yeah I was thinking about going to the show..but now Russ wants to go to the mall.... and I dunno if I wanna ask him about the show.... but...i dunno newayz... I love you guys... i am done

blaaaaaaaaahhhh

2004-08-19T10:21:59Z

----Is this normal?...... Is it normal to get OVERWELMED everytime you here something amazing about Jesus?..... like not in amazement.. but just overwelmed..... I have lately and I hate it.. I dont know what to do ......I feel like everytime I go to a church service they tell you a certain way to think and then I go to another and they tell you a whole other way to think... if that makes since......I dont know what to think anymore. I HAVE BEEN PUTTING JESUS IN THIS LITTLE BOX. I have been so blinded. I think I am this compassionate person... but I am so selfish..... We watch a video on this lady that gave up her rich lifestyle to go to Mosembeck(spelling?) Africa... to eventually help thousands of kides.. THATS COMPASSION....
I dont know what to do any more.....I want to cry everytime I hear something amazing about Jesus.... I dunno.... I CANT DO THIS...... I am tired and weary... I DONT HAVE THE STRENGTH FOR THIS.I CANT DO IT. ITS NOT IN MY MAKING.
I HATE SCHOOL... I HATE SCHEDULES... I FEEL PRESSED BY THEM....AND NEVER GIVE JESUS ANY OF THE TIME.... TIME DOESNT ALLOW... UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH...........
I dont know my Father's voice any more....but obviously I havent got desperate enough because I am still wrapped up in my self.....
ughhhhhhhhhh
JEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSS

Sorry guys.. this isnt too much of a pity party.... forgive me....

*^* CaTcH tHe HoLy SpIrIt FiRe*^*